The old school boozer is dying. A new fad of trendy bars and craft beer is taking over. I've had enough...
It's a Sunday and all I want is a reasonably priced pint, where I can reflect and recover from the night before and maybe catch the end of the football. But in this modern age, I struggle to find somewhere offering such simple pleasures. Instead the streets are filled with waves of bistro bars where Nathan Barley esque figures sip on sickly sweet Aperol spritzers and choke back schooners of pale ale.
I have no choice but to enter. But this is going to cost me, not just a small fortune, but also my soul.
The £6 pint charged inside is justified because it's served in an old jam jar by a hipster with a cool beard.
The are no televisions, just a wireless radio in the corner that's been 3D printed out of quorn.
It takes 20 minutes for my pint to arrive. Not because it's busy, but because the bar-staff are occupied feeding their ego with updated snapchat stories about how cool their moustache is. My pint is terrible. Not sure what this beer is but it's not a Stella Artois. I can't drink it. I have to leave.
I've got a job. I work hard. I pay my taxes. And sometimes I simply need a release. But the offerings of a hipster filled gin bar simply doesn't cut it. All I want is a reasonably priced pint and to maybe watch the football in a pub. A pub where the bar staff are efficient but don't take any nonsense. A pub with a bit of character with some regulars that keep the place lively and interesting. A pub where the only cocktail on the menu is a half pint of Amstel. Sometimes all I want is a Dirty Boozer!
A Dirty Boozer is not a slanderous term. Far from it. In fact a Dirty Boozer is an endearing description, reflecting a place which unites communities and provides a valuable service to those in need, including myself.
There's no judgement in a Dirty Boozer. Discrimination is barred. A haven of the purest solace for the hard working man or woman. As long as you have the minutest piece of mental cohesion you are welcome. And despite the debauchery of previous you find comfort in the Dirty Boozer. That's the whole point. The essence. The love.
This website is dedicated to the Dirty Boozer. I have the pleasure of discovering (normally from stumbling upon) some of the greatest pubs in London and (eventually) beyond. The goal is to create a database of all the best boozers around.
I am ranking each boozer based on my experience, normally based on a single visit. The things important to me in a boozer are:
The price of a pint;
The bar staff ability;
The general ambiance and banter;
The options for watching sport on the tele.
Finally a single half-hearted rule. I will be primarily looking at independently owned pubs only - so no Weatherspoons / Greene King etc. type pubs. A spoons would have to be a complete filth job in order to qualify for this site. Not saying it's impossible, just tough.
Enjoy...